Men’s Circle — A Place to Show Up and Have Each Other’s Backs

This world can feel rough sometimes.
Let’s come together as men and support each other.

Let’s have each other’s backs.
Let’s be there for one another—no matter what comes up.

When we turn toward each other in this good way and truly feel this support, we become stronger, steadier, and more capable. Our women and children feel it. Our communities feel it. Strength rooted in connection changes everything.


Circle Format

Each circle follows a simple, grounded structure:

  • Greeting one another

  • Clearing the space with sage

  • Opening words

  • Introductions

  • A go-around check-in

  • A shared prompt, tool, or practice to help us connect, grow, and thrive

This structure creates safety, consistency, and depth.

Join us.
Now is the time.
Connect with me here.


Tools Course (Optional)

I’ve also created a Tools Video Course. I’m currently looking for a few men who want to practice the material and offer feedback as we refine it.

My intention is to make this wisdom simple, practical, and accessible—especially for young men. My life would have changed dramatically if I’d had these tools earlier. As the saying goes:

It’s easier to raise healthy children than it is to repair broken adults.


How to Be in Circle

Show up as you are.
Be as authentic as you can.

When it’s your turn to share, find the courage to speak what’s alive in you. This takes time. Trust grows through consistency, so coming regularly helps. If it takes a few circles to find your voice, that’s okay too.

The other half of sharing is listening.


A Story About Listening

Twenty years ago I got back into skateboarding. At a skate park in Sunnyvale, my rear wheels kept sliding out on the bowl walls. A man about ten years older than me came over and asked:

“Would you like a suggestion?”

Then he waited.

His tone told me he cared and that his suggestion would help. I said yes. He explained my trucks were too tight, causing my outside wheel to lose contact. He suggested loosening them a quarter-turn at a time.

It worked.

Had he simply told me I was doing it wrong, I likely would’ve shut down and missed the wisdom entirely.


About Advice in Circle

Often the most powerful way to help someone is to see and hear them.

If you notice the urge to fix, advise, rebut, or change someone, pause and ask yourself:

  • Why do I want to fix this person?

  • Is this man needing listening or sharing right now?

  • Can he even hear advice in this moment?

Sometimes our ego sneaks advice in through stories or “helpful” suggestions. Before speaking, listen inwardly. Share your experience, not a diagnosis of another.

If you genuinely feel a clear intuition that may help someone, wait until they finish and ask permission before offering it.

There will be dedicated moments in the circle to ask for advice, feedback, or support. Please save guidance for those times unless explicitly invited.


Positive Witnessing

I once attended a creative writing workshop where the rule was simple:
Only offer positive feedback—what you appreciated, what resonated. No criticism.

The result was profound safety and creative flow.

We carry that same spirit here.


My Role

My role is to steward the circle—not lead above it.

I sit in the circle with you. I do my best to gently hold its integrity and safety. A circle has no top or bottom, no beginning or end. We are equals here.

We are in this together.

Big hug,
Clay Schmitz