Appreciating our home or home appreciation?
I'm sitting on the lanai in Maui enjoying breakfast after a really fun surf at the break we can see from the kitchen window. The enjoyment of the sound of the waves breaking and the birds singing is interrupted by the roar of leaf blowers and a sit down lawnmower. Cue the phrase "first world problems", and that's when it sank in how far from natural this development is.
The monthly Home Owners Association (HOA) dues at this gated community in Maui are around $800 and where I live in California are $380. Both grounds are beautiful and very well taken care of, and at the same time I'm wondering where are the crops, the orchard, and the fruit trees? Every Tuesday a full crew of people come and mow the lawns and blow the leaves for what is usually a full days work. What if instead of taking the mowed grass and tree trimmings to the landfill they left...
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When my first wife left me I was living in her house, in her neighborhood, next door to her brother and his wife, and most of my social relations were with their friends. So the day she walked out I lost most of my community and to say I felt isolated, lonely, and terrified would be a massive understatement. Also I didn't see us living in this higher crime neighborhood for very long so I didn't invest much time making friends nor knowing my neighbors. Further I was also doing most of my shopping either online or at the big box stores, so I didn't have any relationships with the people that worked there. For me the pain of divorce was a huge wake up call to take a look at all my relationships and how I want to live.
My 
I am laying down on a rug, because it's to painful to stand or sit down, when my son crawls into the other room. Getting up has been sending sharp shooting pains through my lower back so I figure crawling after him might be easier and quicker. As I'm crawling I notice it doesn't hurt as much when I move my legs. So we crawl around the room together and make our way back to the rug. It feels so good to be able to move my legs after several days of feeling constant agonizing pain. This is the most excruciating physical pain I have ever felt, my wife had sciatica pain last year and she said it is more painful than labor pains...
I ran into a friend the other day and she asked me about teaching paddleboarding and specifically what happens when you fall in the water? I quickly responded with, "you get wet". She shook this unsettling thought off and voiced her concern about the "dirty" water. I said there is more healing in being in the ocean and nature than not, and she agreed.
"If it was easy everyone would be doing it." This idea that life is hard and needs to be overcome is how I lived the first 20 or 30 years of my life, no pain no gain was my motto. The idea of an easy and peaceful life was for wusses and viewed as undesirable or even impossible. I applied this way of thinking when I learned to surf, believing that I couldn't afford lessons and I was afraid to ask for help, to do so would be a sign of weakness and make me a target for ridicule and rejection.
